There is nothing worse than a coworker (and I know I've mentioned this before) who thinks he's funny but he really isn't. Wait, yes there is. There's the coworker who thinks he's funny but really isn't who won't let his bad jokes die a nice sudden death. NOOOO, he's gotta go to the internet to further enhance the 'comedy' of his joke. And then he laughs at his joke which forces you to at least give the pity chuckle so he doesn't feel like ..... well the weird guy with the weird sense of humour (weird as in not funny, not as in I don't get the joke)

Finally, a member of the media has something positive to say about the Franchise

On a separate note, I should be going to that ATL for good in a couple of weeks. Permanent job offer from the company I have been contracting with. Still working out some details....

Redskins play Denver in a little over a week....

Don't feel like driving today but I guess I have to suck it up and move on....

I have a shopping problem. I've bought 12 shirts in the past week. I have taken my metrosexuality to a new level. And not just with the clothes, oh no! I let the fiancee talk me into getting a pedicure. A PEDICURE!!! I know the new age folks are going to say, 'There's nothing wrong with a man getting a pedicure' but sorry that's not my upbringing. Men have no use for pedicures in my opinion. Nor manicures for that matter. Cut your toe nails, cut your fingernails, and don't think about them ever again. But the part that scares\bothers\boggles me is that I think I enjoyed. I'm almost certain I enjoyed it. And enjoying it goes against my preconceived notions of what was going to happen. And if I can be wrong about this, then heaven forbid I could be wrong about other things too...I feel shaky....my whole belief system is in peril.....if a man don't got his principles what do he got (the worst english I could bring myself to type)!

I must admit though, I didn't know my feet could be so soft and pretty.....WAIT I didn't just say that....but the nails are so shiny....STOP IT.....and the dead skin has gone bye bye... SHUT UP.....and the leg massage kind of got me too....AARAGGGGH

Meanwhile, on the left side of my brain....

FOOTBALL is only 2 and 1/2 weeks away...it's the sport of kings....better than diamond rings....

I'm very irritable today. There are people whose voices are just getting on my nerves and I feel bad because they are nice people, just surprisingly annoying today.

And why do people talk funny when they talk to kids?

And country accents are really starting to get on my nerves? Not everyone's, just certain ones...like the ones attributed to the people whose voices are getting on my nerves....

My off the chain list for July (I say it like I do one every month):

Music:
Joss Stone: The Soul Sessions - This girl can blow. She has a smooth R&B style even though most of her songs are covers. There are one or two tracks on the 10 song CD that are suspect but all in all worth the purchase.
Javier - I can't remember the name of his album but I first heard on late night BET. The entire CD is worth it. I can't think of a song on this album that I dislike. And unlike the current R&B atmosphere, there are exactly zero rap interludes and not a single mention of 22's or a rolex, a BMW 745.

Video Games:
NCAA 2005 - A review of this game is probably uncalled for but at the same time a damn necessity. Can EA sports keep this up? Year after year they give me a brand new addiction and quite frankly, I'm dumbfounded. It's the attention to detail that puts this as a sports game of the year candidate. Camera panning to the fans as they hold up a user created sign. Crowd noise so loud the screen and the controller shimmy like Elton John at a gay music festival. Oh yeah, player suspensions due to academic violations, team rules violations, and who knows what else. And the NCAA will take scholarships. I haven't even gotten to the post season yet, I have a Music City Bowl to play against Ole Miss with Va Tech. There's so much more to this game but you just need to buy it yourself.

People:
This girl here in Winston I'll call C is cool as hell. I don't like to use folks names. She is ghetto as she wants to be, she trys to play hard, but she is just as sweet. She's cool to drink with.

This dude here in Winston I'll call J is just as cool. I actually met C through J. J has more woman problems with his ol' lady than any dude I have ever met that is only dating somebody. I can't think of a time that I've hung with both of them and some kind of argument broke out. But it's kinda funny too and makes me realize how lucky I am L-Boogie (my ol' lady) isn't as crazy as she could be.

Okay. I find it completely unfair that the world is blaming Kobe for Shaquille's departure. Let's think about this....Shaquille, in the very first exhibition game this past season, yells at Jerry Buss demanding more mone given that he was: 1) Overweight....again!, 2)Out of shape. . . again!, 3)In the first year of his extension as it was, and 4)the highest paid player in the league. Enough to satisfy Shaquille? Nope!!! But Kobe forced him out?!?!? Through all of this, has the media reported any Kobe pay demands? Not that I've seen. Even as he tested the free agent market, you never heard of teams not being able to afford Kobe. But Shaquille couldn't be happy be the highest paid player in the league...a mantra he won't deserve when his current contract is up.

Now I have intentionally not spoken of the Phil Jackson situation because honestly I haven't seen the media harp on this as much. At least nothing more than mentioning that Kobe wasn't a fan of the triangle offense which he wasn't but so weren't players! And let's face it, Phil was out coached in the finals, his theory of not calling timeouts to stem runs by the opponent didn't work in this scenario and he didn't do the X's and O's adjustments necessary for the Lakers to win (and yes I still stand by my statements concerning the one-sided officiating earlier, but Phil's approach didn't help matters).

All in all, the Kobe dismantled the Lakers theory is a media created soap opera. Kobe has made no public statements until he announced which team he was playing for yesterday. The Media created a story, and ran with it. Strangely enough, the 'story' that the media has been running for the past weeks about Kobe's evil plan to take over the Lakers is actually an editorial; an editorial is supposed to be an opinion since it's basically based on what one reporter thinks; yet, this editorial has been repeated over and over again by reporters from the smallest, most unconnected news sources to ESPN.com as if there opinions were based on factual conversations held between Kobe and Buss and Kupckak. And still, there is no documentation that Kobe had a thing to do with this 'breakup'. The media, as it often does, has decided to steer the public's perception because it makes for a good story. It's really as simple as that....unfortunately, the public has shown once again they would much rather be told what's going on than to think about it and opine on their own. Groupthink is a terrible fashion to wear........

I thought it best that I not immediately comment on the happenings surrounding Shaquille O'Neal (no longer Shaq, no nicknames for non-Lakers). Up until late last night, I tried to remain neutral given that Shaquille had been a Laker for eight years, I had grown accustom to having the dynamic duo, and that there seemed to be something fishy about the way Mitch Kupchak and Jerry Buss were handling things. Then I watched a press conference by Kupchak, who I still have no faith in as a GM but more on that later. The thing that turned me against Shaquille (and this is a new feeling for me, but it is a passionate one) is the fact that he turned down an extension that would have kept him the highest paid player in the league. What more could you want in a league that's willing to give Carlos Boozer 68 million bucks? But to listen to Shaquille speak, you would think they offered nothing. He says he didn't like the way the team was going, that the executives didn't come to him and communicate effectively, that the organization didn't keep things 'in-house' so to speak. Oddly enough, he is\was the first person to speak to the press about matters that should have been kept 'in house'. It is sad to see what could have been disappear so quickly, so underhandedly (on both sides), and so trivially.

As for Mitch Kupchak, why in the hell are we getting Brian 'my accomplishments in the league (and I played against Magic) total zero' Grant, Lamar 'I've been to L.A. but never really did anything' Odom, and Caron 'unproven' Butler in exchange for a franchise player? Oh yeah, we also get a first round pick which may sound nice unless Miami finishes in the upper echelon of teams then it becomes a twenty something pick....woohoo! Mitch has thrived off the team the Mr. West built. He has yet to make a single improvement that he can call his own. Payton and Malone? They came on their own accord. Now there is a possibility of losing Kobe, Derek Fisher, and a few others. Let's put Magic in the GM's chair....he garners respect from the players, the fans, and anyone who has anything to do with basketball. And further, he's a helluva businessman who knows the game. Yeah, Magic couldn't coach but that's a different animal.

Needless to say, I am not the happiest Laker fan there is right now. I guess I need to try to get excited about our new look teams and try to build some enthusiasm that can only come from the loyalty of a true fan.....shit's gonna be hard though....

Today's question: Why do we call it a toothbrush? We rarely brush just a single tooth. Shouldn't it be called a teethbrush? Or perhaps a teethbrusher?

I'm sleepy but I didn't go out drinking last night. I think all this driving is wearing me down a bit. Plus, I got a speeding ticket yesterday...84 in a 65. Must make a cameo at the Gastonia, NC courthouse. I may have a lawyer go in my absence.

THe ol' battleaxe's birthday is next week and for the second year in a row, I will not be in town. That kinda sucks! Oh well, guess I have to go broke trying to do right by my Bae....

It's been a while since I posted regularly but summertime is so less creative for me. Uh, let's see. Making quite a few friends here in Winston Salem....to the point that I hate to tell them that I may be leaving soon. I ran into a friend I went to VT with. Turns out she is a pretty cool chick. We didn't hang out much in college since I didn't mess with white folk too much, you know I was in my militant phase. But she told me last night that I seemed very different than what she remembered. I was like it's because I talk to white people now. And she was quiet for a second and then she said 'Maybe that's it'. But we ended up hanging out most of the night with good conversation....cool chick cool chick.

I had a thought the other night during karaoke night. Karaoke is discriminatory towards the illiterate. What if someone plagued by illiteracy wants to sing 867-5309 but can't remember all the words. Are they forced to endure the embarassment of having to hum parts they don't know?!?!? WE MUST MAKE KARAOKE AVAILABLE TO ALL!!!!!

"It's been a long time, I shouldn't have left you without a strong rhyme to step to" .. . .Eric B. and Rakim (I think)

Yeah, I know I have been kinda vacant for a minute now. My bad. Still recovering slowly and quietly from the debacle known as the NBA finals. Nuff said about that...

I think I am going to make this my metrosexual summer. I am going to buy one metrosexually inspired clothing item per week. Deciding to dress metrosexually is a big risk since I live in Atlanta, the (drag)sister city of San Francisco. This past weekend was Gay pride weekend in the ATL. That got me to thinking.....homosexuals always claim that they want to be just like everyone else, treated the same etc....but there is no heterosexual parade?!?! I think I'm going to start the Straight in Straight Out Parade for heterosexuality (and lesbians...I like lesbians, not butches, but lesbians). We can have a mobile wet t-shirt contest conducted by the chippendales (so all heterosexuals are entertained) followed by heathen night at a local whorehouse.

Okay, I don't know where all that above came from......